Bagong Karanasan (chapter 8)
read previous chapters HERE
Writer’s Note : This is the first long story I ever wrote. It first appeared on this yahoogroup I belong to (mga_pilipinang_hubad@yahoogroups.com) and then in the tabloid I’m currrently writing for. By now, you probably must have read this because according to this SITE, "in sheer number of distribution, Paolo's Bagong Karanasan, also known as Ate Jam, is the number one for the year of 2005" . Google search “Bagong Karanasan”, “Ate Jam” or “Paolosbrew” and chances are, you will see this story. I also heard that this story is also available in a booklet form (Royalty! Royalty!). Eventhough you can read Ang Bagong Karanasan in a number of sites, I’m gonna post it here with my notes in red font, as a sort of behind the scene look at how I wrote the story. Sige na, pagbigyan nyo na ako. Kunwari lang naman na sikat ako at interesting kung paano ko nasulat ang “epic” na ito nyahahaha…
----- oo0oo -----
Kinabukasan, walang ibang tao sa bahay, nag grocery sila ate Jam at Tita, wala si Tito, kami lang ni Janis ang nasa bahay (o di ba, napaka-convinient na sila lang tao sa bahay, meaning may mangyayari hehe). Galing ako sa tindahan sa kanto, nagpa-load. Pagpasok ko ng bahay, tahimik na tahimik. Nasan kaya si Janis? Tinext ko sya kung nasan sya. Narinig ko ang cell nyang tumunog. Nasa study room ata. Nagreply sya "nsa haws. u?" reply din ako "nd2 lng ako s basketball court, mya ako uwi" (hindi logical kung bakit iyon ang nireply ni Pao eh wala pa naman siya binabalak na kung ano). Naka silent mode ang cell ko kya di nya narinig. Sumilip ako sa study room. Nasa harap sya ng computer, may pinapanuod. Nakatalikod ang computer sa pinto kaya di nya kita na nandun ako sa likod nya.
Shit! Bold ang pinapanuod nya. Japanese na x-rated. Wala akong hilig sa mga Japanese bold (para kasing nasasaktan yung mga babae kung makaungol. Mahilig kasi sa torture ang mga Japs) pero di ko alam na nanunuod pala ng ganun si Janis. Wala naman syang kakilos kilos sa harap ng PC, nanunuod lang. Mayamaya, biglang nag-ring ang phone sa salas. Takbo ako sa room ko. Narinig kong sinagot ni Janis ang phone. Ang Mama ata nya. Nakiramdam ako kung nasan na si Janis. Sinilip ko ang butas sa dingding, eksaktong nakita ko syang pumasok, humiga sa bed ng ate nya. Nakatingin sa kisame, nakatihaya. Iniisip marahil ang pinanuod kanina (sa harap sana ng PC naisip kong may ginagawa si Janis pero nakatalikod nga pala siya kaya walang makikita si Pao, lugi naman yun. Solusyon? Sa kwarto na lang at ang magic butas sa pader). Tama ako, dahil mayamaya, parang may ibang gustong gawin ang kamay nya. Akala kong nagkakamot lang ng hita pero hindi, dahil himas ang ginawa nya. Shit! Dalawang kamay, hinihimas ang magkabilang legs, nakapikit pa atang nakatingala sa kisame. Ang himas nya ay umakyat, simula sa hita, sa hips, sa tiyan at di ko malaman kung paanong silip ang gagawin nang ang boobs na nya ang nilalaro nya. Nilalamas nya. Sa labas ng shirt nya, dalawang kamay na pinipiga, hinihimas, nilalaro ang dalawang murang suso na bago pa lang talaga nagkakalaman (gusto kong patagalin pa ang anticipation ng readers regarding kung kelan magse-sex ang magpinsan, parang foreplay ba). Ahhhh.. tigas na tigas ako. Di na siguro sya nakuntento, pinasok nya ang kanang kamay sa loob ng shirt, nilalaro ang kanyang boobs habang ang isang kamay naman ay hinihimas ang ilalim ng hita, sa may butt nya, sa puson. Malikot na sa kama si Janis, libog na libog na rin siguro, di malaman kung ano ang uunahin. Pasukin ko kaya? Ano kaya ang mangyayari? Nag-intay muna ako. Sinabayan ko na lang ng pagsasalsal.
Biglang umupo ang batang pinsan ko sa kama ng ate nya, at sa isang iglap, hinubad ang damit. Nanlaki ang mga mata ko, dahil kitang kita kong lumabas ang breasts nya, walang bra, hubad na hubad ang pangtaas (time to take it to the next level hehe bka ma-bore na rin nagbabasa). Shit! Shiet! Shieeett! Kita ko ang boobs nya, tayung tayo, ang kinis at ang puti. Mamula-mula ang nipples. Putsa! Ang sarap! Tinitingnan muna nya ang boobs nya, parang sinusukat, lalo na nang sapuhin (apparently, madami ang may di alam kung anong meaning ng "sapuhin" kasi I received a number of emails asking what does it means) nya ito ng dalawang kamay nya. Napapikit sya ng gawin nya to. Iniikot-ikot nya ang mga kamay nya sa dalawang bundok (i hate that term "bundok" and I don't know why I used that here), hinihimas. Nakita ko ng medyo kurutin nya ng sabay ang dalawang mamula-mulang nipples, sa pagitan ng tig-dalawang daliri, sabay higa nya ulit sa kama. Patuloy nyang nilalaro ang boobs nya pero siguro, naghanap ng ibang kalaro ang isang kamay nya kaya gumapang ito pababa. Alam ko kung saan papunta yun. Wala nang liko-liko, dun na agad nagpunta ang kamay nya, sa pagitan ng kanyang mga hita, hinimas nya yun. Mula sa taas, pababa sa may puwitan. Ganun ang ginawa nya, taas, pababa, iisang direksyon, habang ang isang kamay ay nakahawak pa rin sa suso (the devil is in the details hehe). Mayamaya, tumigil sa paggalaw ang kamay nya sa kanyang hiyas, nakita kong ngayon ay mga daliri na lang ang kumikilos, parang may hinahanap, may kinakapa… shit! Ang gandang tingnan ng pinsan ko habang nagpapaligaya ng sarili. Ang kanyang mga murang daliri (murang daliri? wtf!?), may ginagawang mga bagay na di mo aakalain na kaya na palang gawin. At di katulad ng biglaan nyang pag-alis ng damit kanina, ngayon ay dahan dahan kong nakitang humawak sa garter ng shorts nya ang magkabilang kamay, dahan dahang binaba, inangat ang puwet para makaraan pababa ang shorts at tuluyang makarating sa tuhod, sabay sipa palayo. WOW! Hubad na hubad ang pinsan ko! kitang kita ko ang pagitan ng hita nya dahil sa direksyon ko yun nakatapat (todo na to. I was hoping "fire in the hole" na by this time). Kitang kita ko ang kanyang hiyas na malamang ay ako pa lang ang kauna-unahang lalaki na nakakita nun sa edad nya ngayon. Nakatingin ako sa bago pa lang dumaraming pubic hair, sa maputi at makinis nyang hita at mga singit, na ngayon ay hinihimas himas nya. Sumunod na rin ang isang kamay nya pababa. Nakita kong hinihimas nya ang magkabilang bahagi ng kanyang hiyas. Ahhhhh…. Malapit na ata akong labasan. Tinigilan ko muna ang pagmamasturbate. Pinanuod ko muna sya. Gamit ang parehong gitnang daliri, nakita ko nang hawiin nya ang magkabilang pisngi ng kanyang kasarian (compared ngayon, I would have used the word "puke", hardcore na ata ako harhar), binuka yun ng konti, na para bang pinapakita sa akin ang kalamnan nun sa loob (dahil kitang kita ko naman) at nang gamitin nya ang isang forefinger, maingat na hinimas ang inner flesh ng kanyang hiyas, na nakikita kong basang basa na.
Dahan-dahan, maingat na hinahagod ni Janis ang magkabilang pisngi ng kanya, paikot, habang napapa-angat pa ang kanyang puwet sa ginagawa. Parang naiimagine ko na ang kanyang mga ungol ng oras na yun... uhhmmm… ahhhh… uhnghhhhh.. mmmmnnn… napansin ko ng hindi na umiikot ang kanyang daliri dahil marahil sa natagpuan na nito ang hinahanap, ang kanyang tinggil, ang kanyang clitoris na nangangailangan ng atensyon. Yun ang kanyang nilalaro ngayon. Sarap na sarap siguro sya dahil ang likot na ng kanyang balakang. Putsa.
Di ako makapaniwalang eto ang pinsan ko, hubad na hubad, kitang kita ko ang lahat, nagpapasarap sa sarili! Ilang high-school students ang makikita mo sa ganung posisyon! (wala pa) Putsa, lalong nagalit ang etits ko. Di ko na ata kaya, gustong gusto ko na syang pasukin. Bahala na. gusto din naman nya e. alam kong libog na libog na sya ngayon, di na sya marahil tatanggi. Ayun siya, nakahiga sa kama, ako marahil ang iniisip, ano pang iniintay ko (tsaka chapter 8 na ito, dapat may mangyari na). Ahhh…. Sige, intayin mo ko Janis. Dali-dali akong nagtaas ng shorts, nag-ayos ng sarili. Kakatukin ko sya. Tsaka ako papasok kahit nakabihis na sya. Mas okay kung nakahubad pa haha lumabas ako ng room ng nabigla ako sa nakita (dyaraaaan! Ano kayang nakita niya?)…
.....itutuloy.....
What Women Want
ACCORDING TO EINSTEIN'S Theory of Relativity, you need at least one of these three things in order to attract a female. You need to have an above average height, wealth or power.
Good looks help, great personality and a sense of humor too, but girls look for these three things in a man, either consciously or subconsciously. The greedy ones can do it even when unconscious. Think of a Brad Pitt look-alike basurero reaching the height of 4 feet 5 inches. How many Angelina Jolies do you think he have shagged? Just ask Assunta de Rossi.
Nope, I’m not saying that all girls are gold-digging bitches. They’re just bitches –no wait… But girls, you have to admit that you do look for these three things when describing Mr. Right, right? And there's nothing wrong with wanting a guy who have his own money to spend. Or a guy with power. Not necessarily holding a high position in government or at his company but a guy who commands respect among his peers. Shempre, you want him to be tall enough so he can sweep you off your feet and to reach up to him while he kisses you, standing on the tip of one of your feet, as the other feet one slowly lifts up.
In conclusion, guys, you only need to remember these there words. Height, Wealth and Power. One out of these three and you'll be me. Two out of three and you'll be Jules Ledesma, three out of three et voila! You're Prince William.
--oOo--
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Pahabol : Let me take this opportunity to disprove this myth about what WE, men look for a girl. The three “Bs” that is said that we like – boobs, butt and body, those were not true. We want brains, bersonality and bharacter. Those are the three “Bs” that we like.
…and other bullshit stuff that will get us into your pants.
"Ugly" American
...or he could have been of another nationality, but the average Pinoy tends to think all Caucasians are Americans. Much like how our world-war-2 era grandparents like to call them Joe. We almost lynched the bastard.
I went to a Meralco office to pay my electric bill the other day. The place was jampacked with people paying their bills too. In fairness to Meralco, they have ample chairs for everybody and they're handing out numbers so we don't have to stand in line. I was customer number 71. They were servicing no. 25 ---Oh, boy.
A few minutes later, a foreigner walked in, a white guy in business suit. He went to the counter and stood behind the lady paying her bill. Everyone was appalled, looked at each other as if asking why was he not waiting for his turn like everyone else? But being polite Pinoys, nobody said a thing.
A sekyu walks up to the guy and tried to give him a number but Joe just waved him off and continued to stand there. I started to hear whisperings and murmurs around me.
A Meralco supervisor came.
Supervisor : sir, you have to take this number.
White guy : no, I’m just gonna pay my bill.
"Hindi pwede yan, pumila ka din" said the mother beside me. "Ang yabang naman nito akala mo kung sino" somebody at the back said. The white guy just ignored everybody.
Supervisor : but sir, you have to take a number and wait for your turn to...
White guy : you mean I have to wait an hour just to pay my bill?
"Oo, mag-intay ka din. Kanina pa kami naghihintay dito" an old lady sitting in front of me answered, as if kasali sya sa usapan. "Wala ka sa sarili mong bansa" a self-proclaimed patriot at the other side of the room said.
Supervisor : yes sir...
White guy : I have to wait an hour? Shut up...
His "shut up" was in a disbelief tone, like saying "no way, are you serious?" but obviously, the tatay beside me heard it differently. "Huwag kang papayag" the tatay told the supervisor, "huwag kang papayag, minumura ka na oh." By this time, others have joined in, each has something to say about the matter.
The foreigner, probably sensing an agitated mob was about to be unleashed, walked out, wisely, as he was standing on thin ice --errr thin asphalt. I swear, I heard cheering as if we've vanquished the whole US military base out of our lupang hinirang.
"Hindi komo mayaman ka magagawa mo na lahat ng gusto mo" a mother said triumphantly, holding her uhugin kid.
"Kung mayaman nga siya eh di sana inutos na lang niya sa katulong niya" said another.
"Tsaka pwede naman sya magbayad sa internet o kaya sa Bayad Center."
"Pwede din sa megamall o kaya sa 7/11. Ako nga eh..."
"Hindi pwede sa 7/11, tubig lang dun..."
The supervisor jokingly asked the guard why he didn't talked to the white guy. "Sir, baka di kami magkaintindihan eh" the guard said, scratching his head.
Everybody laughed as they continued to discuss what just transpired. After a while, everybody minded their own businesses and went back to their own third-world lives.
Mr. X’s Top 10 (7)
ASIDE FROM MY stories on the tabloid, I also do a column for them (lets call it Mr. X) wherein readers send me text messages asking questions mostly about sex. Just think of it as a sleazy Dr. Margie Holmes, minus the PhD, as I’m only armed with my own meandering experience and some old-fashioned common sense in trying to enlighten, in my own little way, the Pinoy psyche about anything under the sun that is connected, of course, with sex.
I would like to share with you now some of the funniest text messages I receive everyday. Here is this week’s Top 10.
10. Kabit ang problema ko -09182261542
Eto lang tandaan mo: sa jeep, bawal ang sabit, pwede ang kabit.
9. With u be my tx mte by the wy I am ZOREN Pag u nag reply d n kta tx -09166391099
Naka-drugs ka ba? Pag nag-reply, di mo itetext? Ngeeee...
8. Heluw bs. Gdmusnin na.esipkulan kon anu ang g.nagawa mu? S.kama.kase. Hban nakkta keta tomtayu ang t.t.ku -09187248048
Ano raw?
7. Mr. X, pano q maalaman kung mhal aq ng bbae?Kc sa tingin ko naggwapuhan lng cla s kin.Gus2 q sna ung tlagang mahalin aq at d dhil lng s pnlabas n kaanyuan. Danny, 18 Malabon -09208019214
Ang kapal. Hindi uubra yan pre, nasubukan ko na yan.
6. Mr. X mdls q mbosohn hipg q hayup ang ktwn nya pwde q kya kn2tin hipg q? -09058235352
Huwaw! Kalahating tao, kalahating hayop? Pwede mo siyang kantutin pero ingat ka at baka masipa ka lalo na kung kabayo ang kalahating katawan nya.
5. Mr. X mlaki b ang titi m? ispadahan tyo,ktuwaan lng -09166162454
Bossing, bread knife lang ang akin.
4. Mr. X, bkit kya sobra dming lumalabas tamod s kin?Pra pating sago s lagkit at pglumabas masakit. Ano ggwin ko? Tnxs n more power. Agnus ng Paranaque -09064167533
Tiisin mo lang ang sakit pre tas magtinda ka ng sago’t gulaman na palamig. Ayos!
3. Mr. X, aq c Ryan, 16 yrs old. My ipp-advice aq sa yo. Ntotorpe aq s GF q. Nhihiya aq mgtapat s kny ng aking pg ibig. Ano gagawin q? Ryan -09214802951
Unang-una, alamin mo kung alam niyang GF mo siya, bwiset!
2. Hi, malamig kc ang bf ko. Ano kya pwde ko gwin?Playboy bf ko at ayaw ko cya mwala. -09197400366
Humihinga pa ba?
1. Dear,Mr. X my prblema p ako thgkol s pgkalalake k k. Bkit p gnun dti s twing mg-sex kme ng gf. K oke naman tmitgas naman ari k pro ntong hle khit ubot hbad n kme dna ako tnetigasan pro pag tmatae ako tdo naman tgas tti k. Ano p kya prblema k? Slamat p s payo n maibigay m. Brting utoga of tubongan ilo2x -09068071537
Madali lang yan pareng Berting Utoga. Magkantutan kayo habang tumatae ka. Multi-tasking ba.
note: I’m writing the text messages here as I receive them and the texters cell number. Why the cell number too? By texting the tabloid, it is understood that Im going to print their cell numbers unless they tell me that they stay anonymous.
I Made It To A Hall OF Fame
IT MAY MEAN nothing but hey, its a list, a hall of fame (beh-lat!), meaning I'M FAMOUS!
To further satisfy my hunger for fame, here's the link of the Hall Of Fame list. I made it to number 9 and number 63. click the link then click the picture that you'll see there.
Trip Trip Lang 2
(day 15) DAHIL MAY SALA SET SA BASURA
Walking to the pink market to buy stuff for dinner, we saw an antique-looking Chinese closet in the dumpster. That might fetch a few thousand pesos back in Manila but there it was, along with the garbage. I remembered last year, we also saw a nice sala set complete with center and corner tables left in the dumpster. It was really nice and we were thinking how we could get it up my girl’s 12th floor flat. The furniture wont fit in the lift (BTW, they don’t call it “elevator” here, it’s “lift”) so we have to carry them up the stairs. Thinking about it made us tired so we abandon the idea and moved along. It’s an innate trait of us Pinoys to salvage anything that we think is still useful. Except for Bong na di talaga namumulot ng mga bagay…
It was said that if you buy a flat here in Macau and you don’t have any furniture yet, don’t go out and buy them. Just walk around the neighborhood at night and you will surely find some. Totoo.
Back in Manila, that sala set would be gone the minute the owner throws them away. Minsan nga nasa loob pa lang ng bahay mo mawawala na agad yung sala set. Akyat bahay ba.
(day 16) THE GREAT CHINA EXPLORATION –SORT OF
We crossed borders today to mainland China. Zhuhai is connected by land to Macau. Although both of them are part of China, we still have to go thru customs and immigration because Macau is a Special Administrative Region like Hong Kong. Zhuhai has this enormous underground shopping complex where one can buy cheap merchandises. Divisoria? We bought pirated DVDs.
We then took a bus to explore the other parts of Zhuhai but we don’t know where that bus was headed. Bahala na. it feels so much safer in Macau than in Zhuhai that’s why when we sensed we’re not going anywhere worth going to, we got off the bus and headed back to the border.
Movies where unsuspecting tourists became prisoners in some foreign country under communist rule made us want to go back to the safe commune of Macau. So much for the explorers in us, I say.
(day 17) TARANTINO FINGER-FUCKED MANDY MOORE
My girl didn’t go to work today. Still tired from yesterday’s mini exploration, we just chilled out and watch the DVDs we bought yesterday.
It’s a bit cold today so there we were, cuddled up under a thick blanket, enjoying each other’s company watching “American Dreamz” (dreams with a “z”), a boring Hugh Grant-Mandy Moore movie. It’s a good thing we watched Quentin Tarantino’s “Reservoir Dogs” after. “Reservoir” is the big bad mothefucka daddy of Quentin’s later much-appreciated “Pulp Fiction”.
(day 18) CHINESE SCHOOL GIRLS RULE!
Sorry for saying this again (as I’ve said this in a previous entry) but the fashion sense of the Macau teens are such turn-offs. Sobrang baduy. I would have showed you photographic proof but I haven’t taken pictures yet. You can easily distinguish a teenager from Macau if you put him/her beside other Chinese from Hong Kong, Taiwan or the mainland. But as my girl said, they at least spend time to look different, unlike in “cosmopolitan” Manila where most teens are contented to look like everybody. She has a point there pero kahit na. I”ll take the Pinay’s japorms over these bangs and tusok na ripped jeans.
But the Chinese schoolgirls’ above-the-knee length of skirts is major hubba-hubba-ooooh-lah-lah…
(day 19) SMILE, DON’T PUKE
My girl borrowed from her colleagues’ boxed-sets of CSI, Prison Break and CSI’s navy version, NCIS. I decided to watch CSI first.
Being a crime scene investigator can be a cool job, including the processing of decaying bloated corpse on a bathtub. It was said that the number of Americans studying to be CSIs grew when the show became a primetime hit on US TV. I wonder where our own CSIs, known in Manila as Scene Of Crime Operatives or SOCO, stack up compared to their better-trained-and-equipped American counterparts.
Incidentally, did you know that to counter gag reflex or when you’re about to puke, all you have to do is smile? That’s according to the show’s CSIs.
(day 20) FUTBALL!
I passed by a school on my way back to the flat and I was slightly fascinated when I saw a group of students playing football on their school ground. Now that’s something rarely seen in the Philippines, actual people playing football.
I wonder how come football, the game the world plays (or soccer in American lingo), didn’t quite captured the Pinoys’ taste unlike basketball. Was it because our brothers the Americans don’t play football too?
(day 21) CHANNEL SURFING
Macau has, I think, only one TV station that produces a news program and a soap opera that sucks. The rest of their programming load comes from the mainland. Macau TV shows NBA games but mostly Houston Rockets games because of their beloved Yao Ming. A Korean channel can be watched, a Portuguese channel, a number of Hong Kong channels, Ruffa Guttierez’ FTV, a Malaysian channel, a French channel, an Indian channel and the rest are from the mainland like CCTV3, CCTV5, CCTV9 etc. CCTV meaning China Central Television.
And no TFC or The Filipino Channel. I don’t particularly like ABS-CBN but for a Pinoy-news-starved guy like me, I’d even watch Willy Revillame just to hear tagalog spoken again.
(day 22) THE CHINESE RED MARKET
We went to Macau’s red market today. Since Macau is now under the Chinese communist government, hearing the word “red market”, one might imagine the place to be full of China’s Red Armies or that it has something to do with communism. At least that’s what I thought last year when I first heard of that place. However, I was pleasantly glad and surprised to find out that the building’s outside façade is made up of red bricks, hence “red market.”
Har! Har! Har! Tawa naman dyaaaaan…
(day 23) LAPSAPAN
We went back to a place we discovered yesterday while walking to the red market. It is a place known to Pinoys as “lapsapan” (nope, not laplapan. Although a laplapan place sure sounds interesting) from a Chinese word “lapsap” supposedly meaning anything that someone picks up after being thrown away because the object still has some value.
Anyway, some people (read: Sonny) might get shy going to a lapsapan because they’re thinking that someone they know might see them buying cheap stuff that some rich Chinese have thrown away. My girl wisely quip, “if someone I know sees me here, it only means he or she’s here to buy lapsap too.” Oo nga naman. The thrill for both of us in returning to this lapsapan is finding something really valuable in all these piles of seemingly worthless junk.
I could just imagine Mr. Butch Dalisay finding a rare and expensive fountain pen that some rich Chinese unknowing threw away that somehow wound up here in the lapsapan. Because really, if one has the eye for it, it’s not impossible to discover something really valuable. A rare Chinese book perhaps, or that seemingly reproduction of a Monet painting could be a lost and unaccounted for original. Who knows? That old pair of Nike shoes could be a game-worn sneakers of Air Jordan himself or that oil lamp could be Aladdin’s. okay, that might be stretching it but you get my drift.
So what did we buy? A nice and very cheap remote-controlled fire truck toy, boxed-sets of Desperate Housewives and CSI: NY first seasons for a third of the original price in Zhuhai and some Korean films we don’t know about but looks interesting.
(day 24) FOOD
i don't particularly like chinese cuisine but i'm in a chinese land. I like tofu though.
I should have been in Italy. Or France.
(day 25) NEWS
My girl's contract might get extended to three more years. Nothing's final yet but if that's the case, damn, i need to work here and learn cantonese.
(day 26) BECAUSE FISH RULES!
I’ve been watching Prison Break for a few days now. When it was first shown in Manila, I didn’t take interest in it at all, as I don’t really watch that much TV back home anyway. Now, I must say that I’m officially hooked as I eagerly wait to see if Michael Scoffield’s plan to bolt out his older brother Lincoln from the state’s death row prison.
Go Snowflake!
(day 27) COLD FRONT
It’s starting to get really cold nowadays. The hottest temperature for today was around 16 to 17 degrees Celsius compared to Manila’s coldest tempt at around 22 degrees.
It was very tempting not to take a bath even with hater heater but we Pinoys know that’s a big no-no. Mamatay na ang di naligo ngayon.
BLAG! IPao drops dead)
(day 28) THE MACAU TOWER
We had dinner in the Macau Tower’s revolving restaurant with my girl’s officemates from their department. The restaurant sits on top of the tower and slowly rotating 360 degrees around. The buffet tables are fixed at the center of the circular room and only the diners’ tables are revolving. Way, way, way up there, we could see almost all of Macau but since it’s night time, all we saw were Macau’s fabulously lit hotels and casinos.
Their Chinese lady boss was a nice host. She was there with her British husband and their “bibo” daughter who’s a delight to watch running around, talking to almost anyone as if she knew him or her. The kid is fluent in English and Cantonese, which made me wonder what language is she using when she’s silently thinking? Errrr-----
There were lots of food in the buffet tables and we can eat all we want/can. We tried anything that looks edible he-he-he We got “lost” a few times inside the restaurant too. How? After stuffing out plates with food, we turned around to go to out table only to find out that it has revolved to the other side of the room. We have to look for our table or we can just wait there in the middle for our table to rotate back to us.
We went home around 11 p.m. after realizing our tummies were about to explode.
(day 29) LAMAN, KAILANGAN NAMIN NG LAMAN
We went to pink market with my girl’s officemates for the food that will be served for tomorrow’s Christmas eve dinner. The funny thing was, the meat vendors were not there. We were told that it was a holiday so them meat sellers took the day off. Say what!?
What are we gonna cook now? We had to scramble for a way. We looked for supermarkets selling packed beef and pig meat. Thankfully, we were able to buy them at a supermarket but were more expensive.
At least may karne.
(day 30) HELLO TELEPHONE?
Christmas eve was spent with my girl’s Pinoy officemates who were also sent here from their Makati office. I already knew most of them from those times I used to wait for my girl back in Makati.
The night was food-and-kodakan galore, pang-friendster. Everybody’s in high spirit and makukulit although when midnight’s approaching, I sensed sadness and longing in everyone. They started calling their families back home.
Napakasakit, Kuya Eddie… na mawalay sa pamilya ngayong Pasko.
(day 31) SO THIS IS CHRISTMAS
Merry Christmas! We spent the day walking around Hong Kong and Kowloon. We were here last Chinese New Year 2005, Christmas 2005, last July and October. We were able to go to almost all of the tourist spots here that’s why for today, we decided to go where our feet and wandering spirits will take us.
We can spend Christmas cuddled up back in Macau as we were still tired from last night’s festivities but I have to exit Macau because my 30-days visa will expire today. Exit then enter Macau again to receive an additional 20 days stay.
We saw A LOT of Pinays in Hong Kong Central. It’s like being in Chinatown Manila, as there were far more Kababayans than Chinese on the streets. We entered a boutique with a big SALE sign and we were surprised to hear the Chinese salesladies speaking a few tagalong phrases like “tatlo bente lang po” (3 pieces for 20 HKD) and “madami pa sa baba” so we went downstairs to look. I was then almost expecting those salesladies saying “ati, pili na… Pili na ati…” ala Divisioria and Tutuban.
Around 9pm, we decided to return to Macau even though we planned to stay for two days in Hong Kong.
(day 32) CUDDLED UP
It’s a non-working holiday here in Macau and we spent the day cuddled up watching DVD to rest out tired bodies.
Yun lang. Bakit ba?
(day 33) HELL FREEZES OVER
It's so damn cold today. I'm wearing two shirts, a thick wool sweater, a jacket, plus a head bonnet, a pair of boxer shorts, jogging pants and socks on my feet... while having a steaming mug of coffee ona 12 noon. Oh, did i mentioned I'm indoors and wrapped by a thick blanket?
I somehow missed Manila's heat and I'm tired of wearing all these garments!
(day 34) WI-FI
At last, I found a free wi-fi spot here in Macau. We bought a wi-fi card for my pocket pc in Hong Kong and I’ve been searching since we got back from Hong Kong for a wi-fi spot so I can go online. The spot is a park at the back of a building near my girl’s office. After walking her to her office from the flat, I can sit in the park and go online under the warmth of the morning Chinese sun.
(day 35) MACAU REGAL SHOCKER
It was such a shock and a very big news in Macau this past days when the head of their transportation department was suspected of corruption. The Macau government quickly took him out of his post while being investigated.
To which I say: “Bah-humbug! Big Deal.” Wala yan sa Pinas. Nag-hello Garci na nga pero tinatanggi pa din.
(day 36) VIDEOKE NIGHT
New Year’s eve was spent with my girl’s Pinoy officemates again. What’s a Pinoy gathering without videoke singing? I was surprised to find out that some of these 40-something tatays know that RNB song “My Boo”, a song I heard only that day. Ang galling! (or ang tanga ko lang?)
Midnight’s approaching and we still haven’t heard a single firecracker. Them Chinese were probably saving their paputoks for their own Kung Hei Fat Choi.
(day 37) 2007
Happy New Year! We woke up late because we were able to tuck in around 4am. Had brunch, ate last night’s excess food. We went to San Mah Lu in the afternoon. San Mah Lu is Macau’s commercial and “pasyalan” district. Tourists go there to shop and visit some of Macau’s major tourist landmarks like the St. Paul’s Ruins.
Anong ginawa naming dun? Wala lang, lakad lakad lang. for us, it’s not the destination but the journey, HHWWPSP.
What’s HHWWPSP? Ask me :P
(day 38) SEX IN THE PARK
I was sitting on a bench in the park where there’s wi-fi connection, checking the results of my NBA fantasy teams when a seemingly dignified white-haired old Chinese man (no white beard / mustache though) approached me wearing a smile on his lips. He was saying something in Cantonese and I told him I don’t understand and to speak in English. He smiled, points to his wrist while looking at my wristwatch. Ahh, he was asking for the time. I showed him my watch but instead of leaving, he just stood there smiling, as if thinking of something else to say.
He pointed to me then showed one, then two fingers. I assumed he was asking if I’m alone or with somebody. I hand-signaled to him that I was in fact alone. I was thinking then that he just wants someone to talk to. He then points to the Macau Mandarin Hotel near to where we were, then put his two hands in his cheek as if sleeping. Was he asking if I’m staying at the Mandarin? I told him no. He kept on saying something in Cantonese while smiling and I was trying in vain to understand what it is that he’s trying to say because somehow, I sensed that what he’s trying to say is not what I thought he’s saying.
He then made a circle with his two fingers and with a finger from the other hand, he inserted it to the circle and made an in and out thrusting motion.
WHAT THE FUCK!? These old man is a pimp and he was convincing me to try one of his ladies. I quickly said NO! NO! NO! and at last, we understood each other. Only then that he left me alone.
I told my girlfriend this when we saw each other after office but somehow, she has a different version of the whole thing. She thinks the old Chinese is a gay man and he was trying to pick me up. Holy Mackerel!
Thinking about it now, I think I like my girl’s version because that means I’m yummy enough that someone actually tried to pick me up.
(day 39) BILANG NA ANG MGA ARAW
And now, the end is near… and so I face… my final curtain… four more days and I’ll be in Pasig again. Yep, I don’t wanna go back to Pinas yet but not because I don’t like it there anymore. It’s because someone very special to me is here in Macau.
(day 40) HE’S BAAAAACK!!!
The old man is back! While sitting in the park again this morning, I saw the old man again. As I saw him approaching from a distance, I turned my back away from him and wished he wont see me.
After thinking the coast was clear, I felt someone tapping at my shoulder. I turned my head and voila! There he was, smiling at me. he motioned to my pocket pc as if saying “you’re still tapping at that thing?” I nod my head, smiled at him and turned around. He tapped on my shoulder again and points, this time, to the opposite direction of Mandarin Hotel followed by that in-and-out thinggie with his fingers.
Out of respect for the elderly, I smiled at him and shook my head. Deep inside, I was like “get away from me you sick old bastard! Teach me Kung-Fu or Cantonese and I might, MIGHT, go with you. But no tsuk-tsuk-tsuk!!!”) Thankfully, he walked away.
(day 41) ARAW AT GABI…
My girl took a day off so we can spend the whole day together. And we did.
That’s all I’m saying about today.
(day 42) HALF LIFE
I didn’t stay at the park anymore. I don’t wanna see the old guy and his fucking fingers. I just went straight back home. Met up with my girl in the afternoon and we walked back to the flat. I felt like a death row convict about to be executed tomorrow. For tomorrow, I have to leave for Manila.
In effect, its like I’m actually being executed because I feel that I’m leaving a part of my life here. How can one live on a half-life?
(day 43) FROM MACAU, WITH LOVE
Macau International Airport: About six weeks ago, I was here in this airport waiting to go thru immigration and start my temporary stay here in Macau with my girl. I remembered thinking then that this day will eventually come and my girlfriend and I will have to be far apart again physically. And here I am, waiting to board the plane that will take me back to Pinas.
I saw her crying when I was about to check in the immigration. I was thinking kanina na this is not right, we shouldn’t be apart anymore. I told myself that I must work here in Macau if the planned extension of my girl’s contract pushes thru. I’ll take any job but I have to learn Cantonese first.
ANYONE WHO CAN HELP ME LEARN CANTONESE?
Damn, I really have to go. They just announced that the gate is now open for boarding. Bye for now my Be, I’ll see you soon.
Goodbye hotpot, hello instant pansit canton.